Once upon a time, there was a poor woodcutter. He and his wife lived very simply. The woodcutter often wished for more money and a better life. But his wishes never came true.
One afternoon the woodcutter was searching for a tree to cut down. All the trees looked too big or too small.
"I wish I could find a good tree," he said.
Like magic, he suddenly spotted the perfect one. "My wish actually came true!"
The woodcutter raised his ax . . .
Suddenly a small fairy appeared. "Stop! Please don't chop down my home."
The woodcutter frowned. "I need wood to make money. And all the other trees are too big or too small."
"How about this?" the fairy said. "If you leave my tree alone, I will grant you three wishes."
"No, thanks," the woodcutter said. "My wishes never come true."
"These wishes will come true," the fairy said. "But if they don't, you may return and chop down my tree."
It was getting late, so the woodcutter agreed. When he arrived home, he told his wife about the fairy and the wishes.
"Ridiculous!" she said. "Tomorrow you will go back and chop down that dumb fairy's tree." She set a bowl in front of him. "Here, have supper."
The woodcutter looked at his bowl and groaned. "Plain broth again? I wish we had some sausages."
Poof! Two plump sausages appeared on the table.
The woodcutter was amazed. "My wish came true!"
"Indeed, it did!" His wife laughed. "But you used up a wish on sausages. How silly!"
The woodcutter frowned. "It's not funny! Why, I wish these sausages were stuck in your nose!"
Poof! Now it was the woodcutter's turn to laugh. The sausages were stuck in his wife's nose!
"Stop laughing!" she snapped. "I wish—"
"No!" the woodcutter cried. "Don't! There's only one wish left. Let's try to get these sausages out of your nose first."
The woodcutter's wife pulled on a sausage, but it was stuck tightly.
"Let me try." The woodcutter slowly pulled on a sausage.
"Ow! Stop! It hurts!"
The woodcutter let go. "Let's put some grease on the sausages. Then they'll slide out easily."
He spread some butter on the sausages. He tried to pull again.
"Ouch!" his wife cried. "It's not working."
"What should we do?" the woodcutter asked.
"We still have one wish left," his wife said. "And I can't live with sausages in my nose."
"You're right. I wish . . ." The woodcutter took a deep breath. "The sausages were out of my wife's nose!"
Poof! The sausages lay on the table again. The woodcutter and his wife looked at them sadly.
"We wasted the wishes," the woodcutter said.
"At least the sausages are out of my nose," his wife said. Then she smiled. "And you did wish for sausages with supper!" She began to laugh again.
"I'm not eating those! They were in your nose." The woodcutter laughed too.
They were no better off than they had been before. But their three ridiculous wishes sure made them laugh.